Diary: Whining thoughts
I am looking through my Wedding day photos but somehow I didnt feel happy. I just found out yesterday what is actually the main reason why my mil doesnt like me from Day 1.
It is all because of my Chinese Zodiac sign. :( Even though Mr Cheong and I were born in the same year but my birthday is in Jan and rooster is my zodiac sign whereas, Mr Cheong born in the later part of the year has dog as his zodiac sign.
It seems like she has gone to some fortune teller in Malaysia while we were still dating and the fortune teller told her that rooster and dog crashes and wont have a good relationship. Since then she has gone around complaining to the whole world and even asking Mr Cheong to reconsider our relationship after he informed her about our bto flat etc.
I didnt even realise the crash in our zodiac signs until a reliable source told me about it and after googling for a while. Every piece of my jigsaw puzzle is in place
As the chinese saying goes 鸡犬不宁. There will be no peace in the house if the rooster and the dog come together.
One of the page which I have googled states this :
This isnt the only site which claims that it is kinda impossible for a Dog and a Rooster to have any good relationship.
Another one says " Each sign antagonizes the other, and a relationship is likely to bring out the worst in both personalities. This is a difficult combination of energies, as the thin-skinned Dog is not equipped to be the recipient of the Rooster's caustic barbs."
Everything begins to piece together. the zodiac signs crash for Mr Cheong and I is not the only reason for disliking me but because she is dog herself and she is scare to lose to me (She is those kind who can think too highly of herself and the kind that wants to win and cant afford to lose.)
Mr Cheong and I had told her to help us get our wedding date calculated due to respect for her. She is those very superstitious kind unlike my parents. However, she dragged for many weeks giving excuses that she was very busy and has no time to calculate for us and say things like she didnt even calculate for her own wedding kind. (now I wonder if it is really true). I think the real reason should be she didnt want us to get married at all, hoping that by dragging it, we will wait and wait for her before we settle our dates. But well eventually, Mr Cheong decided not to wait for her and went ahead to confirm the date with the hotel coordinator.
So, why did i say that it was deliberate of her not to have the date counted and the true fact is that she didnt want us to get married at all?
She actually went all the way to ipoh to have the date and time calculated for a run-away wife (some relative of theirs) to return home!!!! yet knowing that my zodiac crashes with Mr Cheong, instead of helping us to get a good date so that we will have a happy marriage, she chose to drag and told us no need to count. So a run away wife, a relative of hers is more important than her son's marriage life ya? She is just thinking of herself. She is just hoping that we will not get married or even maybe she is wishing we will divorce asap>? I am very sad and disappointed.
This further explains why she hated me so much to give me a tongue lashing the other day when I was just standing there listening/watching the conversation among her, Mr Cheong and that cockroach
That cockroach is Mr Cheong's female cousin who has romed a singaporean guy last MAy, They know each other for less than 1 year and they decided to get married. She has already moved in with the husband but she moved back to Mr Cheong's house while we were holidaying in Taiwan. And guessed what? She actually took over Bro's room!!!! How can she do that and how can my mil actually allow her to do so. After talking to Mr Cheong, we felt that we need to be more sensitive to the feelings of Bro and Mr Cheong decided to talk to mil about it. Besides that, I made him tell mil about everything I am unhappy of. including the cheapskate angpow given by the cockroach couple on our wedding day.
They have the face to give a S$100 AP as a couple! I dont need her to bao alot...I didnt complain when those Msians relatives of Mr Cheong gave RM800 for 8 pax cause they flew all the way here.. moreover they are earning Msian Ringgit. But this couple works in Singapore, just held their rom which was a lunch buffet at a japanese restaurant at M Hotel. they knew the market rate of the wedding banquet here. Thats the reason why they didnt want to hold their banquet in Singapore and instead choose to hold it in Sabah this coming may! Besides that, Mr Cheong's parents gave her a big AP on her ROM and though we werent married yet then, Mr Cheong still bao another AP(more than the 100 she gave us.....) and Mr Cheong told me that she knows our per table rate prior to that. Please go and check the rates the minimum amount for weekday lunch in hotels $88 per pax, for 2 persons should she at least give us $168 in total? $100 for 2 pax is not even enough to have a weekend buffet dinner for 2 at hotels!
We held our wedding banquet at Sheraton Towers Hotel which is a 5 star hotel on a
Saturday. We are not expecting our guests to bao us the market rate between 160-200 but at least a reasonable amount.
This explains why,
1) She dislike me from day 1
She herself claimed that she is strong and capable and can handle everything. Btw, she also claimed that she knows everything under her inside out including people- This is kinda lame as how can anyone knows everyone inside out including their thoughts? N she has for a couple of times been cheated by people she has trusted and yet she doesnt want to learn her lesson.- Ps. Think I will continue
It is all because of my Chinese Zodiac sign. :( Even though Mr Cheong and I were born in the same year but my birthday is in Jan and rooster is my zodiac sign whereas, Mr Cheong born in the later part of the year has dog as his zodiac sign.
It seems like she has gone to some fortune teller in Malaysia while we were still dating and the fortune teller told her that rooster and dog crashes and wont have a good relationship. Since then she has gone around complaining to the whole world and even asking Mr Cheong to reconsider our relationship after he informed her about our bto flat etc.
I didnt even realise the crash in our zodiac signs until a reliable source told me about it and after googling for a while. Every piece of my jigsaw puzzle is in place
As the chinese saying goes 鸡犬不宁. There will be no peace in the house if the rooster and the dog come together.
One of the page which I have googled states this :
"They don't have anything in common, therefore a relationship
between a Dog and a Rooster is most unlikely and it would require great
efforts."
Another one says " Each sign antagonizes the other, and a relationship is likely to bring out the worst in both personalities. This is a difficult combination of energies, as the thin-skinned Dog is not equipped to be the recipient of the Rooster's caustic barbs."
Everything begins to piece together. the zodiac signs crash for Mr Cheong and I is not the only reason for disliking me but because she is dog herself and she is scare to lose to me (She is those kind who can think too highly of herself and the kind that wants to win and cant afford to lose.)
Mr Cheong and I had told her to help us get our wedding date calculated due to respect for her. She is those very superstitious kind unlike my parents. However, she dragged for many weeks giving excuses that she was very busy and has no time to calculate for us and say things like she didnt even calculate for her own wedding kind. (now I wonder if it is really true). I think the real reason should be she didnt want us to get married at all, hoping that by dragging it, we will wait and wait for her before we settle our dates. But well eventually, Mr Cheong decided not to wait for her and went ahead to confirm the date with the hotel coordinator.
So, why did i say that it was deliberate of her not to have the date counted and the true fact is that she didnt want us to get married at all?
She actually went all the way to ipoh to have the date and time calculated for a run-away wife (some relative of theirs) to return home!!!! yet knowing that my zodiac crashes with Mr Cheong, instead of helping us to get a good date so that we will have a happy marriage, she chose to drag and told us no need to count. So a run away wife, a relative of hers is more important than her son's marriage life ya? She is just thinking of herself. She is just hoping that we will not get married or even maybe she is wishing we will divorce asap>? I am very sad and disappointed.
This further explains why she hated me so much to give me a tongue lashing the other day when I was just standing there listening/watching the conversation among her, Mr Cheong and that cockroach
That cockroach is Mr Cheong's female cousin who has romed a singaporean guy last MAy, They know each other for less than 1 year and they decided to get married. She has already moved in with the husband but she moved back to Mr Cheong's house while we were holidaying in Taiwan. And guessed what? She actually took over Bro's room!!!! How can she do that and how can my mil actually allow her to do so. After talking to Mr Cheong, we felt that we need to be more sensitive to the feelings of Bro and Mr Cheong decided to talk to mil about it. Besides that, I made him tell mil about everything I am unhappy of. including the cheapskate angpow given by the cockroach couple on our wedding day.
They have the face to give a S$100 AP as a couple! I dont need her to bao alot...I didnt complain when those Msians relatives of Mr Cheong gave RM800 for 8 pax cause they flew all the way here.. moreover they are earning Msian Ringgit. But this couple works in Singapore, just held their rom which was a lunch buffet at a japanese restaurant at M Hotel. they knew the market rate of the wedding banquet here. Thats the reason why they didnt want to hold their banquet in Singapore and instead choose to hold it in Sabah this coming may! Besides that, Mr Cheong's parents gave her a big AP on her ROM and though we werent married yet then, Mr Cheong still bao another AP(more than the 100 she gave us.....) and Mr Cheong told me that she knows our per table rate prior to that. Please go and check the rates the minimum amount for weekday lunch in hotels $88 per pax, for 2 persons should she at least give us $168 in total? $100 for 2 pax is not even enough to have a weekend buffet dinner for 2 at hotels!
We held our wedding banquet at Sheraton Towers Hotel which is a 5 star hotel on a
Saturday. We are not expecting our guests to bao us the market rate between 160-200 but at least a reasonable amount.
and guess what? my mil went to tell that cockroach about our happiness and now guess what absurd thing the cockroach did? She tried to top up by giving us a 2nd AP.... zzzzzzzzzz Was she trying to curse us to get married the 2nd time? She even tried to give excuse to say that they were quite broke then.. but pls, didnt her husband just upgraded his car to a bigger one, and she herself just passed her class 2 and got for herself a scooter? They were broke 3 mths ago and right after our wedding.. suddenly become so rich? Mr Cheong refused the AP from her and guess what she said to him? She tried using mil to pressure Mr Cheong by asking him if he wants to go against her 'god mother' aka Mr Cheong's mum's decision.
What kind of damn slutty attitude is that!!!! and my Dear Mr Cheong was still swallowing that.. coming back into the room to tell me what she said to him.. Of coz i told him to tell his mother immediately. I told him to ask his mother into our room to talk to her and tell her about it. He went out.. and I waited in the room for some time.. Found it weird that it took him so long, I went outside to take a look and was listening to the mother when she suddenly blasted at me before I even say a single word. Saying that that cockroach had no problems with her mother in law. She moved over to her house because she wanted her husband to spend more time with the hub's mother before their customary.... What nonsense...They have been telling Mr Cheong of how she cant stand her mil and how bias her mil was towards her hubby and the hubby's bro. Btw she has been staying with the hubby even before their rom. Actually the moment they got together, she moved over. ANd my mil actually shouted at us asking us what we actually wanted, claiming that she has already told her to move out of Bro's room..... I tried explaining to mil that we are not trying to get her to move out, we just wanted her to move out of Bro's room. She can share the room with the other cousin like what she used to do before she moved to her hubby's house. (and the thing is we were all outside not course of the room now.. we had wanted to complain to mil about her stupid attitude towards Mr Cheong which after the whole drama, we didnt manage to cause my mil was indeed bewitched by that cockroach)
Cant exactly remember what mil said and Mr Cheong asked her why was she protecting the cockroach and she suddenly got very agitated and instead of blasting at Mr Cheong, she screamed and shouted at me! pointing to Mr Cheong and then to the cockroach and asking me is his surname Zhang? and to the cockroach .. is her surname Zhang? Is she trying to tell me that my surname is not Zhang and I shouldnt be around when they are talking?.. Btw, I feel like telling her, she isnt a Zhang herself........She claimed that she wasnt protecting anyone (if she isnt, what's with that agitation? when both Mr Cheong and I were still talking nicely to her.. (anyway that cockroach was sitting there nodding her stupid head throughout)
She said that since both are Zhang then no difference and questioned our motive for 'chasing' her out. I told her 1 is brother, the other one is cousin, thats the difference and she. my mil said that there is no difference between brother and cousin. To her, she sees no difference between her son and her niece. WTF. she even repeated that 2x. (MR Cheong was so hurt when he heard that.. but he just kept quiet)
WTF. I was controlling my temper all the while while trying to reason with her. I tried to explain to her that we felt she might have been too helpful and involved in other people business and might have neglected the feelings of Bro. I tried to explain to her telling her that everyone only has 100%. It is impossible for us to help or care for everyone in the world when we give too much to 1, we have to give less to another.. It is not a choice but our limitation. And mil started her nonsense again saying that it is impossible that she will neglect anyone. She started saying that she has this number of staff under her and everyone respect her cause she is fair to everyone. She isnt bias to anyone... if there is anyone who is unhappy, she will make sure they say out and she will resolve the problem....I tried telling her that there are some people who are not the kind who will so willingly share their emotions etc with others no matter how close they are. There are certain things which I find it difficult to speak to Mr cheong about.. there are certain things which I find it difficult to share with my family or siblings too...and she actually asked me why dont I share it? Why dont I tell anyone about it? and claimed that it was my fault if I dont say it out. and said that there is something wrong with this personality and it was due to my upbringing! I was fuming mad. She even claimed that she is 100% sure that Bro wont mind her giving his room away to some other people. She claimed that she knew Bro so well.. know him inside out that she is 100% sure he wouldnt mind...and keep saying that there is some secret between bro and her and she die also wont say out.. claimed that it has to do with some personal relationship. My foot!!!!!! she even told us that she can call Bro right then to see if he feels anything... Please la have some common sense can? U call people and ask or coz they will say they wont mind.. Who will say they mind?????? 2 days after Mr Cheong met up with Bro and Bro admitted that he was sad!
Anyway she kept repeating that she is very strong and capable and can settle all problems.. and got so agitated that she needs to go take medicine..
While she went to take her medicine, cockroach went back to the smaller room. Mr Cheong went over to ask her what exactly did she tell his mother... how come the mother got so agitated. The cockroach was hesitant to tell... and she finally replied saying that it was Mr Cheong who had told her to give the AP to his mother.. and she just go n tie up loose ends to inform the mum that she has moved to the smaller room as requested.
ANd guess wat? my mil ran over to the smaller room and started shouting and screaming again, demanding to know what was communicated. And $^&^%*& i didnt even speak to that cockroach.. i didnt even mutter a single world ...and I kana scolding again... for the next 1hr or so... she started reprimanding me... repeating her story.. saying how strong and capable she is.. saying no one corrected her... even fil didnt say anything about her cause she was always right and she was strong and capable...told me it was wasteful to spend money on celebrations like mother day's father's day and even birthday! say that their family doesnt celebrate bday..and all other occasions. She is indirectly telling me that Im wasting my money or his son's money on all the celebrations? She told me that bdays should be a day to thanks the parents, and I told her I celebrated my bday with my parents every year without fail...even this year after our married... she claimed that she doesnt want all the celebrations but when the sons are free can just call her out see if she is free to have dinner.. Both Mr Cheong and I were trying hard to tell her that celebration can be used as a form of a bonding session.. everyone will make it a point to put away what ever they are busy with.. come together to have a meal or wat... if just ad hoc, u will need a lot more time in order to meet up with everyone..
She turned a deaf ear to everything that we have said...\
Even tell me that if i have time, i should go and listen to the monk's talks at the temple... I feel like telling her.. there isnt anything wrong with me.. but... something is very wrong with her... (but of coz,,, i didnt.. cause Im giving Mr Cheong's face..)
Initially I thought she didnt like me cause I didnt know how to bootlick, I didnt know how to curry favour like the cockroach... but now.. I think.. thats not the only reason why she doesnt like me... the reason was simple.. She cant stand that I was born in the year of the rooster.
This explains why,
1) She dislike me from day 1
She herself claimed that she is strong and capable and can handle everything. Btw, she also claimed that she knows everything under her inside out including people- This is kinda lame as how can anyone knows everyone inside out including their thoughts? N she has for a couple of times been cheated by people she has trusted and yet she doesnt want to learn her lesson.- Ps. Think I will continue
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